I find myself slack-jawed Finger grip Half backwards step Sharp shoulders to my earlobes A subpar cry of what I wish was rage But reads exhaustion Reads barely mobile Reads guttural grumble I realize fear is so common It executes flawlessly Slips from men with shadowed faces speeds through our veins quick as a vine […]
I am simultaneously too much all at once and too little, too late. I came hurdling out of the darkness, startled starling shudder of wings. I am operatic ranges of starving bird pitch, hunger battle cry in the bamboo forest. I am shadows and sunlight, glinting through the woody overgrowth. Delicate and sharp as a […]
The first time I said “no” It sounded like “I love you.” He whispered it against my ear, the words swiveling around the shell – “Tell me you love me.” “Tell me you love me.” “If you say it, it won’t hurt like this.” “Say, you love me.” And he was right. The words slipped, […]
my grandfather stood waist deep in his Sunday best white pressed sleeves rolled back to the elbows the thin line press of his undershirt stuck like pith to his stomach, chest this was the same pool I’d done flips into the day before red-rimmed eyes – chlorine stung knuckles scraped from dragging my hands along […]
I told you I was broken and with a manic urgency you set off screaming down the road of destructive positivity – “You’re perfect, babydoll.” “You’re just fine.” “Are you smoking crack, ‘cause that’s broken. And you aren’t broken.” I am okay with my broken. I have no need to lessen who I am. I […]
You are a hollow concrete wall, stretching miles into the gray sky. You are steady, unmovable, perched on a plateau, untouchable. And I flourish in transformation. I am lacy tendrils of running blue water zig-zagging a dance down your barricade. I am the shimmer in the distance, small dust-cloud rising, as the earth moves under […]
This body is a thing of beauty. This body is the gorgeous stretch of scars that link the pale, soft flesh of my chest. This body has been home to babies I’ve held, babies I’ve raised, babies I’ve loved, babies I’ve lost… babies I’ve grown and and nursed and passed on to arms that weren’t […]
I want to disentangle the image I see of me, anger parked behind my teeth like a tire on top of the curb – the loud, gritty crunch of asphalt enamel twisting under the weight of it, crouched on the tip of my tongue, a tile tiger propped against the wall, an art deco mural: […]
My memory is red wrapping paper crinkled at the corners. It has a tear in the side where the glittering star meets the tangle top prints of evergreens and frosted snow. My memory is bits and pieces held together with tape. It was wrapped by a child – steaming mug of cocoa by their side […]
Grief is a punch in the throat while my lips are wrapped around my favorite piece of hard candy. It’s the lump in my throat, choke as the sugar melts, pain in my chest, stitch in my side. I walked through the doorway. My eyes touched briefly over the waddled-up blanket on the floor and […]
I can paint an impassioned trip down memory lane as sunflowers growing with wild abandon along the windowsill. I can pluck each charming bloom, heavy-headed and bent to the dirt. I can watch petals flutter down, dark seeds embedding themselves deep for conscious growth. I can lay my head down on fertile earth and let […]
